Popular brief jokes

"What thing has got 2 eyes and 100 teeth?"
"A crocodile"
"And 2 teeth and 100 eyes?"
"An INSERSO bus" ( for elder people in Spain)"
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She was a mother-in-law so evil, so evil, so evil... that she died and they wrote on her grave:
"Here she rests,
but... at home...
all of us rest."
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"What is the difference between the lovers and the wife?"
"30 kilos"
"What is the difference between the lover and the husband?"
30 minutes
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"¿Do you know the punishment for bigamy?"
"Having two mothers-in-law"
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"¿What is the difference between a terrorist and a mother-in-law?"
"We can negotiate with the terrorist..."
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The Titanic sinks. The captain tells the foreman:
"Come on, take that pick, break the window and left in a lifeboat."
"But, captain, there are still some women on board."
"For sure... now I'm as well as to fuck...!!!"
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"How long ago do you have the obsession about beeing a dog?"
It must be I was a puppy-dog ago now."
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"Doctor, I have a trouble with my tits."
"With her tits, Mrs?"
"Yes, touch them a little, do you notice how they become tough?"
"I see, I see".
Do you think it's a serious problem?"
"I don't know if it's serious but, contagious, for sure!"
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A man is doing shopping when, suddenly, discovers a new brand of olimpic condoms.
Extremely impressed, he buys a box of them.
When he arrives at home, announces her wife about his new acquisition.
"Olympic condoms?, she says. And why are they special?"
"They are of three colours", he answers, "gold, silver and bronze".
"And... what colour are you going to use tonight?"
"The gold one, of course!", the husband answers very proud.
"And... why don't you use the silver one? It would be better that you sometime finish in second place, don't you think?"
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