JOKE: Answering machine of the psychiatric hospital

   - "Thank you for calling to the Mental Hospital: the company more healthy for your moments of greater madness."

   - " If you are an obsessive-compulsive person, press repeatedly the number 1."

   - " If you are a dependent person, ask someone to press the number 2 instead of you."

   - "If you have multiple personalities, press the numbers 3, 4, 5 y 6.

   - "If you are a paranoid person, we already know who are you, we know what you do  and we know what you want, so you must wait on line while we track your call."

   - "If you suffer of hallucination, press the number 7 on that giant telephone of colours that you (and only you) see on your right."

   - "If you are a mad person, listen to carefully and a little interior voice will indicate him what number to press."

   - "If you are a depressive person, it doesn´t matter what number to press. Nothing will get you out of your pitiful situation."

   - "If you are indecisive person, leave your message after... listening to the tone... or before the tone... or after the tone... or during the tone... Anyway, wait the tone."

   - "If you have a poor self-steem, please, hang up! All our operators are answering to people more important than you."